Tuesday 28 May 2013

Jackpot!

I've just won the lottery!

Ha! I wish!

Would it change me? 
Nah...
But I probably wouldn't have time for you anymore.

After locking up my modest suburban house and changing my phone number, I would slink out of this little town called Melbourne and hide from all of you wanting a slice of my pie. 

MY pie.

Some of you need money way more than I do, and for some of you a little bit of my fortune would change your life forever. But I wouldn't want to play favourites. So it's probably for the best that I don't start sharing.

And what have the charities done for me except call me while I'm scoffing my hot meal in my warm and comfortable home?

So, with my loose change I would make small modifications to my current lifestyle.


I'd go from this:
...that somedays feels like this:
...and downsize it to this:
The Bugatti Veyron. The second most expensive car money
can buy. I don't want to show off. And the best thing?
Only seats two.

I'd move from this:

...to this:


I'd trade this:
...and get me one of these:



I'd go from this:
...to this:
I've hidden her identity as I don't want
people to know it's Mila Kunis.

Take my kids from government schools:
...and stick dump throw hide enrol them in a 
brilliant Boarding School far, far away, like this one:
Institut auf dem Rosenberg, Switzerland


Instead of holidaying like this:
...I'd go here:
Canada
...or here:
Tahiti

And instead of having these:
winetimes.com
...I'd have a couple of these:
mtviewestate.com.au

Nah...just kidding. There's some family I'd throw a couple of bucks to, and some friends. I'm sure I'd make lots of new friends very quickly after winning the lottery, and find some friends I haven't heard of in many many years in the process - some I bet I didn't even know I had.

What's the first thing you'd do if you won a stupid amount of pretend money and lived in La-La-Land with me? 

Linking up with Deb at Home Life Simplified's Listmania.

12 comments:

  1. Love it - great images and laughed at the wine from bottles to vinyards - cool!

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    Replies
    1. I do want to grow my own bottles one day.

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  2. Ditto on the bottles to vinyards, but seriously, how seductive is that photo of Tahiti? Simon, Tahiti looks nice...

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    Replies
    1. I know! And I normally wouldn't go for the places I'd have to sweat or reveal body. Noice.

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  3. only old people will get that.

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  4. Bitch. I can't believe you wouldn't donate some to your Facebook followers. That seriously sucks.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'd pay you to stay with me. Of course I would.

      Delete
  5. If you ever win the lottery babysitting fees will coincidently increase.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Love it! Why share? Only causes drama and fights. You remember we go WAY back, right?! We've been friends a whole two months, right? You'd take me to Canada, right...?!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exactly Kate. Exactly.
      Two months warrants a trip to Canada. But we're not taking kids.

      Delete