The A to Z of Lisa

A is for Awesome, my word of the year. 

It's also for Asshats who I'm always near. 
B is for Baby, asleep like a log.

For me, time for wine and a good chance to blog.

C is for Childcare. Hooray for Monday!
The twins will play there for a part of the day.
D  is for Daddy. Can you please come home soon?
The darlings are feral. Must be that damn moon.
E  is for Energy, something I've not.
Need more time in the day to clean after my lot.
F is for fighting. That's all the kids do.
Five feral children - we'd planned for just two.
G  is for Good Grief, God Lord and Good God.
Words that escape me as I lose my wad.
H  is for Happy. For the most part it is.
It's a hectic and hellish and heavenly shiz.
I is for Ignore. Pick my battles I try.
That's crap and you know it. I rant and I cry.
J  is for Jam - man, that shit is sticky.
It's stuck in Lil's hair, now it's matted and icky.
K  is for Kalm, if you spell it with K.
But you don't and that sucks so move on I say.
L  is for Love. Despite what you think,
My kids - I do love them - they don't always stink.
M  is for Mummy, Mum, Muuuuuum, Mama, Mother.
They shout it from one end of the house to the other.
N  is for Nappies. I'm sick of this shit. 
So for two out of three kids the toilet they'll sit.
O  is for Organised - something I need.
My mind is all busy, it needs to be freed.
P is for Paint - what I have on my wall.
Along with the scribble, the boogers and all. 
Q  is for Quiet and the sleep that I crave.
No questions, no quarrels, the kids will behave.
R  is for Rhyme. I'm not a good poet.
I'm not a good writer. And this doesn't rhyme.
S  is for Swearing. I do it too much.
My kids speak like wharfies - they copy me such.
T  is for Tea. Never know what to cook
To make everyone happy and to not fucking sook. 
 U  is for Uni. I'll finish one day.
A change in career is headed my way.
V  is for Vego. My son's one of those.
If I serve him meat, he'll just turn up his nose.
W  is for Weight. It's a struggle for me.
I'm losing a bit, not enough yet to see.
X  is for X Rays. A lot we've had lately.
Not just our bodies, our wallets hurt greatly.
Y  is for Yawn. It's sleep that I need.
I'm constantly buggered from rearing my breed.
Z   is for Zoo. It's the place I call home.
I love it. I hate it. But I'll never roam.

The A to Z of Lisa, linking up with Deb and all the other amazing bloggettes at Home Life Simplified's Listmania extravaganza. Go have a look!

Leave me a message, please!!! It's so lonely here by myself.

Home

I am only just coming to terms with living in this dog's breakfast of a house, that I have started calling it a home. My home.

My home has been my home from the age of 1 when my parents had it built with the help of the Department of Veteran's Affairs. That's as good a handshake you'd get for serving in Vietnam back in the early 70s. My parents built it with gold glass sliding doors, wood panelling, mission brown paint work and khaki carpet, and Tim and I have only changed it in the last five years and it's still a work in progress.

It is the house I grew up in, the house we lived in as a family and then as a broken family, and the house my mum spent her last few days in.

I've come full circle and I'm raising my family in it now. But moving here with my family couldn't make it my home. It wasn't mine and it didn't feel like mine. It had gone back to being a house.

And now, after years of changing it from the house I grew up in to the home I will make for my family, I have favourite places and spaces I love. 

My computer. Oh, I lurve my computer.
Sorry Timbo, but the computer sees more of me than you do.
I also love my wine bottles I have in various places around the house.
I really do look like a drunkard.

My bed. Especially without Scarlett, but I secretly don't mind her being there.
It's the place that Mumma watches her stories and is not to be disturbed.
It is also iPad zone. And the bedroom is multifunctional -
it's a bedroom/spare room/laundry in one! Jealous?

The Wondertwins cell. It's certainly the prettiest room in the house. This is an old photo of their room as I couldn't get in there through the disaster zone to take a photo. Not that you'd be able to see their beds or floor anyway...
I like this room because it is at the far end of the house. Need I say more?

How good is it that the shine from the window hides the thick layer of dust?
And the sticky mess on the floor to the right of Scarlett's little chubby legs - can barely see it!
I love my TV and my TV loves me.
It not only has my programmes on the Foxtel storage, but it gives me respite from the Wondertwins. And, as you may have read in past posts, I really really need it. 

My kitchen. The heart of my house. Despite having desks in their bedrooms, this is where the homework gets done at the last minute, masterpieces of art are created, meals are rejected, friends gather, and mummy drinks her tequila. 

Did I say 'masterpieces'? I meant 'mess'.

My new garden in the making down the side of the house.
Grace looks like a boy taking a wizz and Lily is the shy one.

This is my new favourite place. I love having a BBQ
and sipping on a wine or four under twinkling stars.

And here ends our tour of my abode. I managed to avoid showing you the bloody battles and filth that normally makes up my home. Yay for me! 

Have a peek at other blogger's homes and favourite things at Home Life Simplified's Listmania link up. And then back to me, me, me at Cut My Milk Facebook page. I have now posted some photos of what my house looks like on a regular day, room to room. Trust me - this is therapeutic for both of us!


And please leave me a comment - good or bad - I'd love to hear from you!

Knock Knock

Good God, my kids make me laugh! 

When they are not shitting me to tears with extreme public tantrums, slapping each other on the head & running for their lives, creating masterpieces of art on furnishings (what's with their paper aversion? And why is it always with markers or nail polish?) my darling little comedians can have me in stitches.

The Wondertwins, Lily and Grace, at 3 years of age, have been working on their comic routine. They still like their poo poo and wee wee and bum jokes (well, who doesn't?) but I've started to get little glimpses of more sophisticated humour.

Lily: Knock knock, Gracie.

Grace & Lily, my funny space aliens.

Gracie: Who dere, Lily?
Lily: Banana.
Gracie: Banana who, Lily?
Lily: Carrot.

Fits of 3 year old laughter.

Gracie: Knock knock, Lily.
Lily: Who is dere, Grace?
Grace: Lemon.
Lily: Lemon who?
Grace: Just lemon, Lily. That's all.

It took Ella a while to cotton on to the idea of Knock Knock jokes. About 6 or so years. We'd give her examples of them:

Tim: Knock knock.
Me: Who's there?
Tim: Lettuce.
Me: Lettuce who?
Tim: Let us in our feet are freezing.

2 men walked into a bar...no, wait...it was
3 men & they...no, wait...a man and a horse
walked into a bar...& something happened...
but I can't remember. But it was funny.

So Ella would try.

Ella: Knock knock.
Me: Who's there?
Ella: Aunt.
Me: Aunt who?
Ella: Let us in our feet are freezing.

and...

Ella: Knock knock.
Me: Who's there?
Ella: Doctor.
Me: Doctor who?
Ella: Let us in our feet are freezing.

It was obvious she had missed a very important developmental milestone - the acquisition of pun and play on words. I've worked with hearing impaired kids who had difficulty with jokes, particularly those that have the manipulation of words, sounds and homonyms. Funnily enough, Ella is extremely strong in literacy - but is just one of those kids who took a hell of a lot longer to grasp humour and hold on to it.

But with the twins, I'm fascinated daily with their language growth. 
In the car they like to play 'I Spy'.

Lily: I spy, my little guy, someping aginning wiv train.

Grace: I spy, my pretty eye, somepink aginning wiv green and it's a tree.

We're getting there.

I spy two cuties.

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Arts & Crarts

One of my twins favourite past times is what they like to call "Arts and Crarts". I am very very glad I pushed for hardwood floor for downstairs and not the lovely beige carpet we have upstairs. The lovely beige carpet is now decorated with red lipstick scribble, pink marker 'writing' and finger painted faeces (but I have cleaned that). 

Lily is a great artist. She loves drawing those circle people with stick arms and legs, eyes, nose and crooked smiles. Shame she won't do it on paper so I can frame it. I've given up on cleaning the walls. I'll keep the scribble there for years to come to remind them of the little shits that they were.

Gracie's mojo is to scribble a ball. Lily will often tag this art with her signature blob man.

Little Boy Sitting on a Bed,
(Ella's lipbalm on cotton, by Lily, 2012)

Green, by Grace.
Happy Little Lady, by Lily, 2012
(Kitchen wall art in pencil & marker)

Incy Winsy Spider, by Lily, 2012
(Pen & pencil)

No one has fessed up to this one, but boy was I fucking mad.
Looks more like Lily's handiwork. The other headrest has one, too.
(Permanent marker that I didn't know I had)

Not even Scarlett is safe from them

There's no bloody way she'll ever do my make up.

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